Definitions
     1.   Esteem: opinion, judgment, appraisal
     2.   Self-esteem: opinion of yourself, self-image, self-concept
               a.   everyone has self-image
               b.   question: is it good/bad, valid/invalid
     3.   Biblical self-esteem: self-image that conforms to Bible, self-image God wants you to
     have.

Your self-image is biased
     1.   Self-image has strong impact on your mind
               a.   influences what you do
                         i.   sets limitations on what you’ll try (“I can’t do that.”)
                         ii.  prescribes ways you do things (macho, nobody, expert, leader, follower)
               b.   influences what you see/hear (communication includes hearer’s interpretation)
                         i.   compliments or criticism (“I’m not nearly as good as they think.” “They
               don’t understand me.” “They’re just jealous.” “They’re right; I’m no
               good.”)
                         ii.  actions, gestures, body language
                                   (1)  take them personally, interpret motives; based on your self-image
                                   (2)  Example: someone looks at you and frowns. Interpretation based
                    on self-image. What are some possible interpretations?
     2.   Sample tests of your self-image
               a.   Your opinion of yourself frequently contradicts that of others.
               b.   Can you accept your appearance as it is and not fuss about it?
               c.   Do you drive yourself to become more nearly perfect?
               d.   A secret feeling of superiority? Often remind others of how good you are/were?
               e.   Talk down to people?
               f.   Talk up to people?
               g.   Are you frequently critical of others? Use “put-downs”?
               h.   Do you belittle yourself?

Small group discussion
     1.   5-6 per group, person wearing most blue is leader. Leader’s job is to make sure
     everyone has chance to give opinion
     2.   “How does your work affect your self-esteem? (job, school, housewife, etc) 7 minutes

Healthy self-image
     1.   A healthy self-image is seeing yourself as God sees you; no more and no less.
     2.   1 Co 15:10 “by the grace of God I am what I am”
               a.   Paul: before, he’d persecuted the church; now, he’s an apostle to the church.
               b.   Reason: God’s grace had made Paul what he was
     3.   Humility (familiar biblical concept)
               a.   is not self-abasement; self-abasement is a sin.
               b.   humility is:
                         i.   knowing who you are, giving God the glory for what he has made you.
                         ii.  being grateful to God for abilities he’s given you, plus trusting him for
               your inadequacies.
     4.   Servanthood (another familiar concept)
               a.   effective servanthood requires healthy self-image
               b.   problems serving others if:
                         i.   feel threatened treating someone else as better than yourself.
                         ii.  struggle to make yourself look better, make others look worse.

Three Basic Emotional Needs
     1.   Belonging - need to feel loved unconditionally, to feel accepted.
     2.   Worthiness - need to feel acceptable; internal “wholeness,” good feeling about
     yourself, have value.
     3.   Competence - need to feel adequate, confident

Conclusion
     1.   Next week: spiritual factors affecting self-esteem.
     2.   Following weeks: in-depth study of three basic emotional needs
     3.   “A healthy self-image is seeing yourself as God sees you; no more and no less.”