Biblical Self-esteem, Session 11
Title: Discipline, Punishment and Self-esteem, Part 2
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Intro
     1.   Final session on biblical self-esteem; viewing yourself as God sees you.
     2.   Three basic emotional needs related to self-esteem:
               a.   belonging, worthiness, competence
               b.   fulfilled in your relationship with God
     3.   Last week: biblical perspective of discipline and punishment

Continuation
     1.   Quickness of punishment and discipline
               a.   Lk 13:7-9 “So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, ‘For three
          years now I’ve been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven’t found
          any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?’ ‘Sir,’ the man replied,’ leave
          it alone for one more year, and I’ll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit
          next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.’” — indicates (1) patience; (2)
          reasonable effort; (3) decisive action if problem persists.
               b.   2 Pet 3:9 “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand
          slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to
          come to repentance.” — (1) patience, not slowness; (2) objective: change; (3)
          keeps his promise
               c.   Eccl 8:11 “When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts
          of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.” — once
          sentencing/judgement occurs, punishment should be swift.
               d.   This isn’t “making excuses” (“He’s just a boy.” “He’s had a hard life.”)
               e.   Process:
                         i.   guidelines/laws well-known
                         ii.  patience to give time for change
                         iii. reasonable effort to train & correct
                         iv.  decisive & swift punishment if violation continues
     2.   Appropriate punishment
               a.   1 Co 11:32 “When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that
          we will not be condemned with the world.”
                         i.   Degree of punishment? Lesser judgement & discipline for small offenses
               to prevent them from becoming major violations deserving sever
               punishment.
                         ii.  How does this protect a person’s sense of worthiness? he avoids greater
               offenses, which will destroy his sense of worthiness.
               b.   Lk 12:47-48 “That servant who knows his master’s will and does not get ready
          or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. But the
          one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten
          with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be
          demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more
          will be asked.”
                         i.   ignorance of the law doesn’t prevent punishment, but reduces the
               severity
                                   (1)  carnal nature: do what I want without suffering
                                   (2)  carnal nature: unfair to punish if person didn’t know
                         ii.  those with greater responsibility are held more accountable
                                   (1)  should this apply to congressmen, government officials?
                                   (2)  compatible with diplomatic immunity?
                         iii. willful disobedience is punished most severely
                                   (1)  criminal law: should repeat-offenders be released on parole?
     3.   Purpose of discipline and punishment
               a.   Jn 15:1, 2, 16 “I am the true vine and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off
          every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit
          he trims clean so that it will be even more fruitful.... You did not choose me,
          but I chose you to go and bear fruit — fruit that will last.”
               b.   Why do people violate laws and rules? For personal benefits (fruit)
                         i.   crime does pay (in short term): pride satisfied (I did what I wanted);
               material gain (I got what I wanted).
                         ii.  punishment must outweigh benefits of violations, must be appropriate
               and proportional to the offense
                         iii. if energy not spent on unacceptable behavior, can be invested in
               acceptable behavior, which has longer-term benefits.
               c.   purpose of discipline and punishment: to “prune unacceptable fruit” so longer-
          term acceptable fruit can result
               d.   How does this affect a person’s sense of competency? In short term, may
          reduce; in long term, definitely increases.

Conclusion
     1.   Discipline and punishment are beneficial to our 3 basic emotional needs:
               a.   sense of belonging: we’re disciplined because we belong
               b.   sense of worthiness: guilt destroys self-worth; discipline helps us avoid guilt;
          punishment relieves us of guilt
               c.   sense of competence: prevent us from wasting ourselves on useless things;
          greater long-term success increases our sense of competence.

Discussion Questions
     1.   Do you think spanking is a healthy form of punishment? Explain, basing response on
     biblical principles rather than cultural.
     2.   What objective should our prison system have and how can it achieve them?
     3.   Does the church have the right to discipline its members? Explain.
     4.   How would you define “just punishment”?